Now What?

Okay, so we flew to Texas a couple weeks ago and did a marathon home search. I think we looked at between 15-20 houses in two days. We found two that were pretty much what we were looking for. We put an offer on our favorite. Someone beat us to it. We put an offer on #2. Offer accepted. YAY! Financing agent says sure. YAY again! Pay $200 for an inspector to go out and do his thing. Inspection report comes back, and the foundation needs work. (Apparently, foundations are quite the issue in Texas)
Anyway, it needs $2500 in repairs, and we cannot get financed without the repairs being done or the price being reduced by said amount.
So, we resubmit our offer, including the needed changes. No Go. So... offer withdrawn. No house. Sad face.
So now we start the whole process all over again. Only problem is, we are 1,000 miles away! Grrr. We certainly cannot afford to keep flying down there to look at houses. So now, I am searching online for houses and let me tell you... trying to do a home search online is a great way to start, but actually getting an idea of the condition of a property from those tiny, grainy pictures is next to impossible!
Anyone have a small private jet they are willing to let us borrow for a quick weekend jaunt?

He's Home!

HUBBY'S HOME!! YAYYY.. **booty shake**
Ok...
Gonna go play. Have a happy day!

It was one of those days

Today was one of those days that make you want to pull your hair out by the roots, then bash your bald head repeatedly into the nearest solid object. Preferably a wall.
Firstly, regardless of the rather large stack of work waiting for my attention today, I had to leave after only half a day because with all the events we have going on for SAAM, (Sexual Assault Awareness Month) I have racked up enough comp. hours this week alone to take off a day and a half sometime real soon. Hmmm... Monday and Tuesday perhaps? Nahh, I'll save them for AFTER this month is over and I am reeling from exhaustion.
Anyway...
The deal on the house we were hoping to purchase in TX fell through today. Sad face. Our agent emailed me some documents that needed to be signed and sent back TODAY. No problem, right?
Yeah.
So. I get home, open my email and download the documents. Then hit "print". Nothing happened. "This document failed to print". No shit sherlock! For whatever reason, my printer is no longer recognizing my PC. yay. So, I go to hubby's PC and do the entire process over again. It prints out just ducky. Good to go. Get the papers signed, put them in my scanner to upload them for emailing. Nothing happened. I didn't even get an error message. Nothing.
Grrrr.
Well, the documents have to be back in the agent's hands before the close of business today. So, I hopped in my car and ran down to the library to get them faxed. "Sure, V, we can fax those for you at $1 per page!" says the perky library gal. A DOLLAR per page! Egads! Ok, fine, I need them sent.
Perky library gal loads them into the fax, punches in the number, page one sends, page two gets halfway into the fax... then stops. And nothing happens.
Unable to figure out the problem, perky library gal refers me to the bank across the street. I dodge farmer john's truck and run across to the bank. "Sure, we can fax those for you... no problem" so I hand over the documents, she runs them through the fax no problem.
However, by this time, I trust nothing and no one so, I call the agent. "hmm.. let me check. Nope, nothing in the fax. Did you send them to 214-***-****?" Yep. "Hmm.. Strange"
So.
I run back to the library where perky library gal informs me that the fax is once again working just fine. I hand over the papers yet AGAIN. She loads them into the fax, punches the number in and ... yep, you guessed it. Nothing!
By this time, I am a raving loon.
"Do you perchance have a scanner?" asked I, in my calmest, I'm about to go postal voice.
"Yes, but I don't know how to use it" replies perky library gal.
"I do, I do! Please, please, please let me use your scanner" I think there might even have been a tear tossed in with the begging. I know... pathetic. But, what can ya do?
So, she takes me back to the office, I get the papers scanned, attached them to an email and away they went. Finally.
It's a conspiracy, I am sure of it. Machines hate me.
Come to think of it... I'm not to fond of them at the moment.
Anybody remember that Stephen King movie where all the machines went nuts? "Maximum Overdrive" I think it was called. Seriously grade B movie with Emilio Estevez in it? I swear I heard that fax machine snicker.

So... My Day Began With...

All my life, I have had this irrational fear of spiders. Big ones, tiny ones, I don't care... I see a spider, my eyes bug out, my heart jumps into my throat, my body freezes and I hyperventilate. I then scream bloody murder for a husband, a son, a dog, I don't care, someone come save me from this vile evilness! Every time. Could it have anything to do with my evil older brothers ripping the legs off spiders and throwing the bodies on me when I was a young girl? Ya Think?! Brothers are EVIL.
Anyway.
This morning, as I was getting ready for work, I walked out of my home office and there it was, bold as you please on the arm of the sofa. The BIGGEST Wolf Spider I have EVER seen in my life. "Come on baby, I DARE you to try to walk past me" I swear, I heard it give an evil chuckle.
Now, as I mentioned in an earlier post, my husband is out of town on business. My sons had left for school, and the damn dogs were outside, happily frolicking in the grass, leaving me all alone with this monster of immense proportions. I froze.
"ok.... ok..... ok....ok.... ummm.... ok. oh god." I stood and chanted. I could not move, except my eyes, which were frantically searching the room for something, anything with which to rid the world of the beast set to devour small children and unsuspecting arachnophobes.
The only thing within arms reach was the vacuum. The only truly nice appliance I own. We have a Dyson... and after two or three years, it has never once clogged. Ever. I love my Dyson. Anyway. It was the only thing within reach, as I mentioned.
Slowly, sooo slowly so as to not disturb the beast and cause it to hide out until I fell asleep tonight, when it would have the perfect opportunity to climb into bed with me and devour my face while I slept, I reached over and grabbed the long wand attachment. (anyone who owns a dyson, knows that you don't just attach the wand, there is a bit of a process to it, which on a normal day, is no big deal)
I finally got the wand attached, then froze again as the spider moved a bit.
After making sure it was done for the moment, I slowly reached over and switched on the vacuum, and slooowwly approached the sofa, wand extended as far as my arms will reach to ensure that NO spider yuckiness gets anywhere near me; I chanted "don't you move, don't you move" over and over under my breath, then literally jumped forward three feet and sucked it up in the vacuum!
I then flung my beloved dyson from me, shuddered and shook for about five minutes then called my husband (who is in Tampa, two hours flight away) and snarked at him for making me kill my own spider.
So, now I have a huge spider INSIDE my vacuum, and you can bet your ass it won't be ME that empties it out!

My Son, The Total Doofus

So tonight I had grand plans after work. I was going to make dinner for the kiddos, (hubby is out of town for business this week), then I was going to continue with the oh so fun project of removing layers of old wallpaper from the walls of one of the bedrooms.
As I mentioned previously, we are moving to Texas this summer, and since our current house is 108 years old, YES, REALLY!, there is much that needs to be done to prep it for sale. Anyway... I was going to peel wallpaper.
Instead, my 16 year old future brain surgeon comes into the kitchen as I am cooking dinner with a SOCK wrapped around the middle finger of his left hand. "Ummm, Son?" says I.
"Yes, mom?" says the future brain surgeon.
"Why is there a sock around your finger?" (secretly pretty sure of the answer, but, optimist that I am, hoping for the best, silly me!)
"Welllll... I was bored, cuz my computer is not working." sez he.
"And?" queries I, with one eyebrow quickly making its way up into my hairline. "Well, I was cutting something with my hunting knife and it kinda slipped".
So, instead of an exciting evening of peeling wallpaper, I got to make yet ANOTHER trip to the ER for the cleansing and suturing of a wound on my sons person.
I can't tell you how many times I have said to this boy as he leaves the house "Have a good time, but don't break yourself! I am busy today, and am NOT taking anyone to the hospital!" This kid has made more trips to the ER in his 16 years than I have in 40! Unreal.
You just wait until I get my hands on my brother that provided my accident prone teenager with a Buck Knife.
Oh, by the way... I requested that they give my son a Tetanus shot. It had been a few years since he last had one, and I figure, anyone dumbass enough to play with a flippin' Buck Knife deserves at the least a tetanus shot.

My Head Spun Around On My Shoulders Today, Then Exploded

I was sent this link http://www.salon.com/mwt/broadsheet/2008/04/02/brits/index.html today.
I swear, my head spun round on my shoulders, I swallowed my tongue, and I believe my head exploded for good measure!
This "person", and I use the term extremely loosely, The British National Party's London leader, Nick Eriksen compares rape to a woman being force fed chocolate cake! and says "To suggest that rape, when conducted without violence, is a serious crime is like suggesting that force feeding a woman chocolate cake is a heinous offence." and "Women enjoy sex, so rape cannot be such a terrible physical ordeal."
OH. MY. BLEEDING. LORD.
I am literally quivering with rage.
Let me know what you think.

Well, I've Done It

So. Today was both happy and sad. At one point, I was actually laughing and crying at the same time. We found out today that the people accepted the offer we made on a house in the Lonestar State and we close in May.
I also, in preparation for the move and to give them time to find a replacement, turned in my resignation at the most amazing job I have ever worked. June 20th will be my final day. Hence, the both happy and sad.
How many people out there can honestly say that they look forward to going to work in the morning? I do. I love my job. I love knowing that every day that I go to work, I touch someone's life in a positive way. I help people. That's what I do. It's who I am.
For example; I was the opening speaker at a "Take Back The Night" event last week. I found out that I was the opening speaker about ten minutes before I stood before the mic and had zero time to prepare anything. I guess that's why it came straight from my heart. Several days later, I happened to be speaking with one of my volunteers who is a senior at the university where the event took place. She told me that at least three others found the courage to stand up and speak about the atrocities they had been subjected to, because of my speech. How powerful is that?
It began thusly;
"Hello everyone, it is wonderful to see so many of you here tonite, willing to stand up to resolve violence against women. My name is_________ and I am the Volunteer Recruiter for ________ Crisis Center. But, before I began work for ________, I was a victim. At the age of four, I was taught the proper way to perform oral sex by my teenage male babysitter. I thought it was a game. He was nice, and I really liked him. He took me places, brought me little presents. I did not know there was anything wrong with what he was doing, and so, I never told anyone. I was ten the first time my father molested me...".
I has taken me 20 years to be able to speak comfortably, without shame, about the horrors I suffered at the hands of my father. Now, I use my life experiences to help other rape and incest survivors.
The bastard DID NOT WIN! I am stronger than he.
So... now all I have to do is locate a rape crisis center in or near our new town that is looking for an awesome Volunteer Recruiter...
Piece of cake.