My Son, The Total Doofus

So tonight I had grand plans after work. I was going to make dinner for the kiddos, (hubby is out of town for business this week), then I was going to continue with the oh so fun project of removing layers of old wallpaper from the walls of one of the bedrooms.
As I mentioned previously, we are moving to Texas this summer, and since our current house is 108 years old, YES, REALLY!, there is much that needs to be done to prep it for sale. Anyway... I was going to peel wallpaper.
Instead, my 16 year old future brain surgeon comes into the kitchen as I am cooking dinner with a SOCK wrapped around the middle finger of his left hand. "Ummm, Son?" says I.
"Yes, mom?" says the future brain surgeon.
"Why is there a sock around your finger?" (secretly pretty sure of the answer, but, optimist that I am, hoping for the best, silly me!)
"Welllll... I was bored, cuz my computer is not working." sez he.
"And?" queries I, with one eyebrow quickly making its way up into my hairline. "Well, I was cutting something with my hunting knife and it kinda slipped".
So, instead of an exciting evening of peeling wallpaper, I got to make yet ANOTHER trip to the ER for the cleansing and suturing of a wound on my sons person.
I can't tell you how many times I have said to this boy as he leaves the house "Have a good time, but don't break yourself! I am busy today, and am NOT taking anyone to the hospital!" This kid has made more trips to the ER in his 16 years than I have in 40! Unreal.
You just wait until I get my hands on my brother that provided my accident prone teenager with a Buck Knife.
Oh, by the way... I requested that they give my son a Tetanus shot. It had been a few years since he last had one, and I figure, anyone dumbass enough to play with a flippin' Buck Knife deserves at the least a tetanus shot.